Monday, February 22, 2010

The things your teenagers teach you

This evening has been a very enlightening one for me. After eating dinner, which my lovely daughter prepared for us, I cleaned the kitchen while the little kids, (what I call the children under middle school) did homework.My daughter and I have a deal that when she cooks I clean. Sounded like a good deal until I realized that when I cook, I clean....and when she cooks I clean??? Hmmmm...not such a good deal After that, my husband and two teenagers (16 and 17) watched some Olympics. Michael Phelps was being interviewed about the next summer Olympics coming up in two years in London. My daughter was wondering why he was being interviewed. After all, he is known for his human fishiness, not anything involving snow.

We talked about how he won so many golds and the fact he was going to try to make the team for the London Olympics. Then she asked me this question. "I read in an article somewhere that Michael Phelps has some kind of mutation that makes him a good swimmer." I gently told her that what the article said was that IF they were going to genetically DESIGN a swimmer, it would be him because of his body ....long torso, short legs with flipper feet etc...She INSISTED that she read that his cells recover faster than other peoples which is why he can swim so many races. When I tried to convince her otherwise she would have none of it. Finally, I used my sarcastic nature, which I have an abundance of and said this.

"Yes Laney, you are right. Michael Phelps DOES have a mutation that makes him a better swimmer."

"I KNEW it..." says my darling daughter. "What is the mutation," she innocently asked.

"It isn't one that many people know about," I tell her. "If everyone knew he might be kicked out of the coming Olympics and stripped of his medals he already won."

Totally captivated she leaned forward. "What is it Mom? TELL me."

I also leaned forward and said in a low voice, "He IS a mutant. He has breathing gills. The reason no one knows is because they are hidden underneath his testicles." Then I sat back. With one look at her face I started laughing and laughing and laughing. After a moment of shocked silence in which her mouth hung open she too laughed and laughed...eventually shaking her fist at me in righteous indignation.....

Perhaps it was not the most APPROPRIATE humor to use on her, but I couldn't help myself. TOO funny....


  1. hahaha that was too funny! and here I thought you were going to say he pees in the pool.

  2. How can they NOT pee in the pool? Getting out of those outfits they swim in now has to be like emerging from the birth canal all over again!!!!

  3. LOL, literally. My son looked at me like I'd lost my mind (yet again), and asked what was so funny. I didn't go into details, he's 12 and doesn't have the attention span to get the whole story any way ;o) , just told him a funny blog.

  4. I try to make my blog reflect the funnies in my day...with my drug exposed children it seems that there is too much focus on the icks....Humor is so important dont' you think?/